It's been a long time, I shouldn't have left you

Wow, where did the time go?  I'm ashamed of the fact that I completely missed the month of April.  I have a good reason though.  April was quite a busy month, one that I'll never forget.  HR asked me to marry him on April 10, and I've been floating on cloud 9 ever since.  In fact, we just got back from a much needed vacation to Playa del Carmen.  My too brown skin hates me for it, but we had a great time.  I can't wait to go back.  This fool even said 'what about Memorial Day?'.  He must've forgotten that we have a wedding to get ready for.  I told Miss G Chic that I would write while I was away, but I vacationed from most everything.  He even threw me a couple of side eyes if I was on the computer too long, so I mostly had to sneak to do anything.  Pitiful, I know, but liberating at the same time.  So yeah, where was I?  Oh right, I's engaged now.  HR decided to make it official and bestowed me with a pretty, magnificent ring.  I'm still not used to it and sometimes find myself staring at it during the day, while working, driving, etc.  That can't be safe right?  I think I'm still suffering from the shock of it all.  I'd be lying if I told you that I wasn't expecting it, but regardless it's still a surprise when it happens. 

This is supposed to be one of the happiest times in my life right?  Unfortunately, wedding planning has its ups and downs, but it's all worth it for the ultimate goal.  This is how I look at it at least, but ever since I've been engaged, everybody and their mother has some sort of advice.  While most of it is unsolicited, I appreciate the bits and pieces that I filter out.  And trust me, there's a lot that has to be filtered out.  One of the best pieces of advice that I've received is to not try to please anyone buy myself.  After all it is my (our) day, not anyone else's.   With the few decisions I've made thus far, including date, bridesmaid dress ideas, if I bothered myself with other's opinions, I'd be completely stressed.  To be quite honest, I think a lot of the 'stress' that comes with wedding planning is caused by other people.  I've decided to not let other people's idea of what MY wedding should be like get to me.

While I've decided that I'm going to be in an eternal state of bliss until I become Mrs. HR, there are a few things in particular that rub me the wrong way and if you don't want to get on my bad side, you should try to avoid.

1. "Wow, that's quick.  Shouldn't you enjoy your engagement?" - What does that even mean anyway?  Besides saving up money, what is the point of a long engagement?  No one grows up and says, "I can't wait to be engaged!".  (at least I didn't)  If you make up your mind to be married, and need to have a long engagement for reasons other than money, or if you need to get your mind right (unless it's premarital counseling, which I think is important)...chances are you probably aren't ready.  To be honest, I can't wait to be a newlywed.  I know this comes with it's own set of challenges, but it's called life.  I actually had someone ask me if I was pregnant.  o_O  I think the days of long engagements are behind us.  I know quite a few people who either are engaged or recently married who had 'short' engagements.  Many of the venues that I checked out even confirmed this.  One even mentioned that they need to change their contracts to reflect the shortened engagement periods.
2. "I assume I'm invited." - Big mistake.  Don't assume anything when it comes to weddings.  It's not that I don't want to invite people, it's just that I know a lot of people and it's just not possible.  Part of the reason I chose to have the wedding in Atlanta was to shorten the guest list.  (my Daddy really does know everybody)  If we're fake friends or you made a comment like 'hey, I didn't know you were dating anyone', you definitely won't get an invite.  Plus ones (and definitely not your entourage) aren't even a given on my list.  Let's be honest, if you're not super serious with someone and/or I don't like them, they aren't invited.  It's not like my wedding will be the social event of the year or anything, but you'd be surprised at stuff people say.  Real friends (who don't make the cut) will understand.

Other than those couple of things.  Life is good, real good.  I can't wait for what the future holds.  I will do my best to do a better job of updating more often.  Please hold me to that.  If you care to keep up with the preparations for the big day, check me out at kellyandrodneygetmarried.tumblr.com.